


nothing's lonely now

by ohmcgee



Series: ohmcgee's mallverse [55]
Category: DCU (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Retail, Depressive Episode, M/M, Manic Episode, Multi, Talia's a bitch because she is, Transphobia, bipolar character, mallverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-29
Updated: 2016-12-29
Packaged: 2018-09-13 06:27:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9110593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmcgee/pseuds/ohmcgee
Summary: “It’s Christmas,” Bruce sighs. “It always makes him...not himself.”





	

**Author's Note:**

> Holidays aren't easy for everyone. 
> 
> Protect Harvey Dent 2k17

“Fuck,” Jason swears, still wearing the oven mitt he used to take cookies out of the oven with as Harvey pulls his sweats down and kneels behind him. “Harvey, I gotta --”

“You gotta,” Harvey growls out as he spreads Jason’s cheeks. “Let me eat you out right now.”

“But the -- _ahh fuck me --_ ”

Jay grips the edge of the counter as Harvey licks a stripe up the crease of his ass, reaching down to play with Jason’s balls as he laps at his hole. He’s been like this for days now, especially since Damian’s been at Talia’s all week, like he just can’t get enough. Wednesday Jay came home from work to find Bruce riding Harvey in the garage, their hair still sweaty from playing, Bruce’s sticks scattered across the room. Last night Harvey crawled into bed sometime after two and slid his fingers into Jason, whispered filth into his ear until Jason shook so hard it woke Bruce up. No one got much sleep after that. 

When Bruce gets home later Harvey’s passed out on the couch and Jason’s decorating the cookies he didn’t get to earlier.

“Hey you,” Bruce says, leaning in to kiss Jay behind the ear and Jay finishes the icing before he puts the pastry bag down and turns around to kiss him. Bruce glances over at Harvey and smirks. “Tire him out?”

“Jesus,” Jay sighs, then laughs. “Other way around. I think I’ve reached my limit, man. I have met the maximum amount of orgasms one person can have in four days. I’m officially tapping out.”

Bruce chuckles, but he glances back over at Harvey and Jay sees the little wrinkles in the corner eyes like when he’s in real deep thought about something. 

“Something’s up with him,” He says, not a question, and Bruce just frowns and sighs. 

“It’s not the best time for him, no,” Bruce says, but he doesn’t go into any more detail and Jason doesn’t figure he needs much anyway. It’s not hard to figure out. Holidays usually fuck him sideways too, but something about Bruce is settling him this year. He has that luxury whereas Harvey really doesn’t get a choice. 

“Don’t forget,” Bruce says as he reaches over and plucks a gumdrop eye off of one of the gingerbread men. “Company christmas party tomorrow night.”

“Right,” Jay says. “Yeah. I. Dickie actually needs me to --”

“Ah no,” Bruce says. “You’re not getting out of this one. The girls at the office are beginning to think I’ve made you up.” 

“But,” Jason says, chewing on his lip. It’s not that he doesn’t want to go, not really. He’s just worried he’s going to stick out like a sore thumb and not just because of the blue hair. “I mean. What about Harvey? Don’t you think he might feel left out?”

“You’re sweet,” Bruce says, sitting down in one of the kitchen chairs and pulling Jason into his lap. “But I already talked it over with him. He hates these kind of things and even if he didn’t, he’s not really in the right place to go currently.”

“Right, but --”

“Jay,” Bruce says and bites softly at Jason’s shoulder. “Please?”

Jason groans and squirms in Bruce’s lap. “Asshole.”

Bruce just chuckles against his throat. “I need a shower. Join me?”

“Bruce,” Jason groans. “I told you. I’m tapped _out._ ”

Bruce just laughs as he stands up and throws Jason over his shoulder. “We’ll see about that.”

 

: : :

 

Half an hour later the water is _still_ warm, goddamn rich people plumbing, and Bruce’s hand is tight around Jason’s cock as he rubs his dick against his ass. 

“Tell me,” Bruce murmurs next to Jason’s ear before taking it between his teeth. “Tell me what Harvey did to you.”

“How do you know I didn’t do things to him?”Jason asks, breath catching when Bruce’s hand drops lower to squeeze his balls.

“Because you,” Bruce says, dragging his teeth down Jason’s neck. “Are a little cockslut, darling.”

“Oh fuck you -- ah, fuck _me_ \--” Jason clambers at the wet tiles as Bruce pushes inside of him, thick and hard and god, _so good._ Shit, Bruce might be onto something there. 

“Tell me,” Bruce says again, still working himself in slowly, one hand on Jason’s hip and the other splayed around his ribs. “Is that what Harvey did?”

“God, Bruce,” Jason pants. “Stop teasing, just --”

“Did he fuck you like this?” Bruce continues, still slowly stretching Jason until he bottoms out, then leans in to lick drops off water from the shell of his ear. “Does he fill you up as good as I do, Jay?”

“Oh my _god_ ,” Jason groans and reaches back, digging his nails into Bruce’s hip. “Just fuck me, I’ll tell you. God, just --”

Jason’s moan is amplified by the acoustics in the bathroom when Bruce pulls back, then snaps his hips. His eyes roll back in his head so far he’s not sure they’ll ever be the same. 

“This morning he fucked me, yeah,” Jason says, laying his right cheek against the smooth tile as Bruce starts to fuck him. 

“Where?” Bruce grunts out. 

“Our bed,” Jay says. It still feels weird saying it, or admitting it, that he’s fucking another dude in _their_ bed. “Woke me up with his mouth.”

“I thought you said he fucked you,” Bruce says in between pants and biting at the back of Jason’s neck. 

“Mm,” Jason moans when Bruce reaches around and gets his hand on his dick. “He made me come in his mouth, then he fucked me.”

“God,” Jason hears Bruce barely whisper over the spray of the water and the echoing slap of their bodies. “Did you come again?”

Jason blushes and doesn’t say anything.

“Of course you did,” Bruce says. “Just like you’re going to come for me now.”

“Bruce,” Jason whines. “I can’t. I’m serious. I --”

“You can,” Bruce says, biting the back of Jason’s shoulder so hard he leaves the imprint of his teeth behind. “You will.”

“Bruce, no, ” Jason gasps as Bruce strips his cock as he fucks into him, harder and deeper each time, ramming Jason’s prostate with every other thrust. “Bruce, Bruce, I _can’t-_ \--”

“You know you can,” Bruce growls into his ear. “Do you know why?”

Jason whines.

“Because you,” Bruce says, breathing heavily against Jason’s ear. “Are a filthy. Little. Cockslut.”  
“Oh fuck,” Jason says, knees collapsing on him as the orgasm rocks through him with Bruce’s last thrust. His dick is still spurting when Bruce pulls out and turns him around, then drops down on his knees and catches the rest of it with his mouth, some of it smearing across his cheek and in his beard before he can swallow Jason down and milk the rest out of him. 

“Bruce, fuck,” Jason whines pathetically, then reaches down and wipes the come off Bruce’s cheek as Bruce jerks himself off, leaving a ring of teeth marks behind on Jason’s thigh when he comes. 

Harvey walks in the bedroom a few minutes later while they’re drying off and getting dressed.

“Oh,” he says, looking lost. “I was wondering where you...right. Anyway. The dog ate all the cookies. Thought you’d want to know.”

“FUCK!” Jason says, wrapping his towel around his waist and taking off down the stairs. “ _Prince!_

 

: : :

 

“You look nice,” Harvey says the next evening, leaning in the doorway in a pair of ratty jeans and one of Jason’s t-shirts that Alfred must have thought was his. 

“I look like a tool,” Jason says, fingers tripping over themselves as he tries to get the knot in his tie right. “Who wears a fucking tie? Assholes, that’s who.”

“Heh,” Harvey says and pushes himself off the wall, walking over to move behind Jason and help him out. “Guy that owns this house might be offended by something like that.”

“Screw that guy,” Jason says, watching the silk slip through Harvey’s fingers in the mirror in front of them. “He’s making me go to some damn party where everyone’s going to say stuff like _mergers_ and _networking_ and I’m gonna drown myself in the goddamn punch bowl.”

“Nope,” Harvey says, looping the fabric around. “Fancy parties don’t have punch bowls.”

Jason knows it was just supposed to be a joke, but it doesn’t _help._ He jerks out of Harvey’s grips rips the tie off, scrubs his hands through his hair. “Fuck this. I’m not going. I’m can’t -- _fuck._ ”

He paces back and forth in Bruce’s huge bathroom and Harvey just leans back against the counter and watches him. 

“First time I did this kinda thing,” he says. “I was just outta law school. I was wearing this second hand suit that didn’t quite fit, a fake rolex, and I just knew everybody in the room knew it.”

Jason stops pacing for a second. “Yeah?”

“They didn’t,” Harvey says. “They were too obsessed with themselves to even give a shit about the fake letters on my watch, but I still got drunker than my dad on Christmas morning and fucked the waiter in the alley when he went on break.”

He gives Jason’s a cocky little grin and Jay grins back, the tension melting out of him. 

“Trust me, kid,” Harvey says, pulling Jason back over to him so he can fix his tie back. “You’ll do fine.”

Then Harvey ties the knot tight, runs his fingers under the band, hooking them under the silk and tugging Jason in for a kiss, hot and hungry, the same way Harvey’s been kissing him all week, like he can’t get enough of the way he tastes. Jay knows he’s supposed to be getting ready, but he gets carried away when Harvey starts groping him, doesn’t even hear the door when Bruce walks in or his shoes against the tile, only realizes he’s there when he presses against Jason from behind.

“You look gorgeous,” he says next to Jay’s ear. “Doesn’t he, Harvey?”

“Kinda like a smaller you,” Harvey says, eyes already blown when he pulls away from Jason’s mouth. “But hotter.”

“Mm, fuck you too,” Bruce says and Jay can see his smile in the mirror over his shoulder. 

“Actually,” Harvey says, undoing Jason’s trousers. “I thought you might…”

“Oh jesus,” Jay murmurs as Harvey slides his pants down and wraps his hand around his dick, then passes the bottle of lube from the top drawer to Bruce. “Aren’t we gonna be late?”

“Probably,” Bruce says and Jason surges forward, pressing his forehead against Harvey’s collarbone when Bruce pushes into him. 

“ _God,_ ,” Jason groans, wrapping his arms around Harvey’s shoulder as Bruce grips his hips and starts to fuck into him. 

“Christ, you’re such a slut for his dick,” Harvey growls next to his mouth, catching it with his teeth on Bruce’s next thrust, jerking Jason off mercilessly. “Tell me how he feels.”

“Good,” Jay moans, completely shameless. “So good. Have you -- _nnghfuck_ \-- have you ever --”

Harvey just chuckles. “Tell you that story another time, kiddo.”

“Ah, fuck,” Jason gasps, digging his nails into Harvey’s shoulders as Bruce picks up the pace, biting and sucking on his neck and throat as he pounds into him. “Wanna see that. Wanna watch you fuck Bruce, Harvey. I --”

“Jay,” Bruce growls out and Jason whines as he buries his cock inside of him and comes, hip stuttering, breath hot against the back of Jay’s neck. 

“Christ,” Harvey breathes out, watching as Jay turns his head so they can kiss, open mouthed and messy, still stroking Jay hard and fast. “Oughta leave him like that, Bruce. Take him to that nice party with all those nice people, come dripping down his thighs the whole night.”

“Oh my -- _fuck_ ,” Jason screams and shoots all over Harvey’s t-shirt when he comes, grasping and tugging at Harvey’s hair as Harvey milks every drop out of him. Bruce gently moves him to the side, sitting him on the counter next to Harvey right before he drops down in front of Harvey and pulls his sweats down, swallowing Harvey’s cock like it’s nothing. 

“God, Bruce,” Harvey breathes out, reaching down thread his fingers through Bruce’s hair. 

“Oh fuck,” Jason agrees, leaning his head against Harvey’s to watch Bruce’s mouth stretch around him. “That’s…”

“Shit,” Harvey says. “Bruce, I’m gonna --”

“Yeah,” Jay says, kissing Harvey’s jaw, moving up to bite at his earlobe. “Come, Harvey.”

“ _Fuck_ ,” Harvey yells and grips the side of the counter as he comes, unable to look away from Bruce as he swallows around him. 

“Now,” Bruce says when Harvey stops shuddering, standing up to zip his pants. “We really do need to --”

Jason grabs him before he can finish his sentence, sucks on his tongue and licks around his mouth, kisses him until he’s kissed the taste of Harvey completely out of his mouth. “Or,” he says. “We could stay here and move this to the bed.”

Harvey just chuckles and smacks Jason on the ass as he walks out of the bathroom. “He’s just trying to get out of the party, boss.”

Jason scowls at him. “Traitor.”

“Mm,” Harvey says, making a kissy face at him. “Have fun.”

 

: : :

 

Fun isn’t exactly what Jay would call it, but after Bruce feeding him a few flutes of champagne, it’s not as terrible as he thought it was going to be. 

“It’s not that bad,” he says. They’re sitting at a table with another couple, Tyler and Nick, and Tyler just mentioned that Nick wants to let their son play hockey and he’s terrified their kid’s going to come home with a concussion after every game. 

“Uh huh,” Bruce snorts. “Coming from the person who nearly called 911 when another child hip checked Damian.”

“That was _not_ a clean check,” Jay says. “And that kid was a monster, okay? He was like six foot tall and --”

Nick and Tyler both start laughing. 

“Jesus,” Tyler says. “You sound like you’ve been married longer than us.”

Jason panics. This is the part where he chokes. They _aren’t_ married. Damian’s not his kid. Hell, Jason’s just a kid. He’s just a kid with blue hair who’s fucking some older rich guy. They’re going to think he’s just after Bruce’s money. Or that he’s just some little fling. Or that --

Bruce just laughs and throws his arm around Jason’s shoulder. “Sometimes it feels like forever.”

“Yeah,” Nick says, smiling at them. “I know what you mean.”

 

: : :

 

Jay’s quiet on the way home, just kinda coming down from all the people and noise, all the glasses of champagne he had. It’s after midnight and he’s tired, so he tugs his tie loose and laces his fingers in Bruce’s, leans his seat back a little and turns his head to the side. 

“How come you didn’t correct them?” He asks, having to repeat himself when Bruce can’t hear him over the radio and has to turn it off.

“Who?”

“Tyler. Nick. Whoever it was, I couldn’t tell them apart.” Bruce laughs and Jay realizes it’s possible he had too much to drink. “When they said we were married.”

“Ah,” Bruce says and he squeezes Jason’s hand, but he doesn’t say anything again for another few moments. “I just don’t like to talk about my personal life much.”

“Oh,” Jason says, still staring at Bruce’s dark profile from where he’s laying in his seat. 

“Is that what you want?” Bruce asks quietly a few moments later and Jason burst into giggles.

“Sorry,” he says. “Sorry. I’m not. I mean, no. Really, no. It’s just weird, sometimes. Not being able to explain what this is, y’know? I'm always people are gonna think I'm just some weird phase you're going through or something.”

“I beg your pardon,” Bruce says, taking Jay’s hand back in his. “I haven't had a phase since 1989.”

“Was it goth?” Jay grins up at him. “It was goth, wasn't it?”

Bruce just brings Jay’s hands to his mouth and kisses his knuckles. “I'll never tell.”

It’s after one when they get home and Harvey’s not only still awake, he’s apparently repainting his room. Every piece of furniture that had been in the guest room he’s staying in is piled up in the hallway and he’s got reddish-orange paint in his hair, singing _The Show Must Go On_ at the top of his lungs. 

“Oh hey,” he says when he sees them standing there. “It was really dull in here. Bruce likes his shit spartan, ya know, but I’m a man of _color_. Well --” Harvey laughs, a little too high pitched for him. “Not like that. I mean, I think maybe one of my great-great-great --”

“Jesus,” Jay whispers next to Bruce. “This isn’t good, is it?”

Bruce frowns, but he doesn’t say anything, just takes his coat off and pushes up his sleeves. 

“What are you doing?” Jay asks and Bruce just shrugs. 

“Helping.”

 

: : :

 

After they get the walls finished and wrestle Harvey into the shower, the three of them tumble into bed.

“Hey, you know what we should do,” Harvey says, lying on his back, drumming his fingers against Bruce’s thigh. 

“Sleep,” Bruce grunts. “We should sleep. For a week.”

“Pussy,” Harvey says, grabbing Bruce’s wrist to check his watch. “It’s only four. Sun’s not even up yet. We should go swimming.”

Jason giggles against Harvey’s shoulder. “It’s December, Harvey.”

“So what,” Harvey shrugs. “Pool’s heated. Bruce is rich, did you know?”

“Mm,” Bruce says. “Don’t mind the snow.”

“You guys are no fun,” Harvey sighs, then rolls over in a flash and crawls on top of Jason, pinning him to the bed. “You assholes went out and left me here all alone and had fun without me. I think you should make it up to me.”

“I think you should eat a couple of Ambien,” Bruce mutters and Jason kicks him in the shin. 

“Harvey,” Jay says, pushing up onto his elbows. “It’s late and I’m beat, man. Why don’t you crawl in here with us and --”

“Yeah, no thanks,” Harvey snaps and climbs off of him. “You guys go ahead and snuggle though.”

“Harvey,” Bruce sits up and tries to take his hand, but Harvey just flinches as soon as Bruce touches him, looks like he’s about ready to pull back and clock him. “Come on.”

“It’s fine,” Harvey snaps, then looks like he tries to take a breath, exchanges a look with Bruce. “It’s fine. ‘Night.”

Jay sits up and leans his head on Bruce’s shoulder after Harvey walks out. “Is he going to be okay?”

“It’s Christmas,” Bruce sighs. “It always makes him...not himself.”

“That makes sense,” Jay says, pulling the covers back. “Dickie used to get sort of weird around the holidays too.”

“Weirder, you mean?” Bruce smirks and Jay just shakes his head.

“Quiet,” he says. “For Dickie that’s pretty weird. He just really missed his mom and dad, you know?”

“Mm,” Bruce says. “Unfortunately, I don’t think Harvey’s holiday memories are as good as Dick’s.”

“That’s rough,” Jay says, getting up and pulling the covers back before crawling in bed. “But he’s got us now.”

Bruce climbs in bed behind him and wraps his arms around him as Harvey’s iPod starts blaring from downstairs again. “That he does.”

 

: : : 

 

Christmas Eve Jason wakes up at seven to start on pies, letting Bruce sleep in as he slips out of bed and pads downstairs to take out the pie dough he mixed up the night before and roll it out. Harvey’s light is still on when he goes past, but when Jason cracks out the door he sees that Harvey passed out at some point, and frowns at the bottle of scotch on the night stand next to his bed. 

Bruce wakes up an hour later, rushing downstairs to peck Jason on the cheek and grab a cup of coffee, telling him he just got a call from the office and needs to go in to handle something, but it shouldn’t take long. 

“It’s Christmas fucking Eve,” Jay glares. “You’re like, the boss. Tell them to fuck off.”

“Jay,” Bruce says, tipping his head up to kiss him. “I promise. I’ll be back before noon. You won’t even miss me.”

Jay just sighs and shoves him away, turning his music back on as he goes back to what he was doing. All morning long he waits for Harvey to get up, to come into the kitchen and pester him while he’s baking, talk his ear off about law school or some gig they had in Chicago, but by the time he gets all three pies made, Harvey still hasn’t come out of his room. 

Around lunch Jason makes Harvey a sandwich and leaves it by his bed. He really just wants to kick his shoes off and climb under the covers, curl around Harvey and ask him to tell him stories, but there’s too much to do and he guesses Harvey really does need to rest. It’s been ages since he’s slept more than two or three hours at a time. 

The rest of the day is spent cleaning up the house and getting it ready for guests later that night, wrapping the gifts he never got to because Harvey was always _distracting_ him, and checking on the turkey every hour or so. Bruce gets home after one and Jason immediately sends him outside to fix some of the decorations that have started to fall. While Bruce is outside on a ladder his phone starts ringing. Jason doesn’t normally answer it, but he does look to see who it is so he can tell Bruce who called and it’s just Damian, so he picks it up. 

“Hey brat,” Jay says. “Merry --”

“Jay,” Damian says, sniffling. “Can you. Can father come get me?”

Jason stops in his tracks. “What happened? Are you okay?” _Who do I need to kill?_

“I just want to come home,” Damian says, smaller than Jay’s ever heard him sound before, and it’s like being kicked in the gut. 

“Yeah,” Jay says automatically. “Of course. What about your --”

“She doesn’t care,” Damian says. “She wants me to leave.”

Jay clenches his fist so tight his nails bite into the skin of his palm. “I’m on my way.”

 

: : :

 

Damian’s sitting on the steps with his coat and backpack on when Jay pulls up in the driveway. This is the first time Jay’s ever actually been here. It’s a huge house, old like Bruce’s. Jay thinks he remembers Damian saying something about it being in their family for generations or something. 

“Hey,” Jay says when he walks up to him. “I left the car on, go ahead and get in.”

Damian peers up at him. “Don’t bother with her.”

“Just go get in the car,” Jay says, squeezing Damian’s arm, then walks past him and rings the doorbell. 

Talia answers the door in a gorgeous, floor length red dress in the middle of putting an earring in. She looks Jason up and down disapprovingly. “Bruce’s midlife crisis,” she says. “Charmed. But I’m afraid I don’t have time to --”

Jason catches the door before she shuts it on him. “What did you say to him?”

“To who?” Talia asks, sweeping her hair over her shoulder. 

Jason stares at her. “Your son?”

“Oh,” Talia rolls her eyes. “He has a flair for the dramatics, like his father. In fact, his father has rubbed off of him in many undesirable ways.”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” Jason snaps. 

“You know exactly what it means,” Talia replies. “Filling his head will all sorts of nonsense. He thinks he can -- do you even know who he wanted to invite for Christmas dinner?”

Jay’s stomach sinks. “Jon.”

“Yes, well,” Talia says distastefully. “I’m sure you think I’m some evil bitch --”

“Correct,” Jason says, furious.

“But these children have no idea what they are talking about. Damian can no more tell me that he is _asexual_ than he can tell me how much money he will retire with. And this _Jon_ , her --”

“Nope,” Jay says, shaking his head. “We’re done here.”

“You coddle him too much,” Talia says. “He’s going to grow up to be weak and pathetic.”

“Yeah well,” Jay says, throwing her a look before shutting the door. “At least he won’t be a cunt.”

 

: : :

 

When they get home Damian goes upstairs to call Jon. Bruce is in the shower, so Jay goes back downstairs to check on Harvey, who’s still asleep. It only two hours until everyone’s going to start showing up though, so Jay crawls under the covers next to him and touches his face. 

“Hey,” he murmurs, stroking the roughly unshaven patches of stubble on Harvey’s jaw. “Haaarveeey --”

Harvey wakes up with a jolt, eyes flying open and reaches out and grips Jason’s wrist. 

“Hey,” Jay says softly, trying not to wince at how tight Harvey’s holding his wrist. “It’s just me. I’m sorry I woke you, I just --”

Harvey lets him go immediately and shakes his head, wraps his arms around Jay and buries his face in his neck. “I’m sorry,” he mutters. “Bad dream.”

“S’okay,” Jay says, combing his fingers through Harvey’s hair. There’s still paint in it. “You should grab a shower before dinner.”

Harvey makes a noncommittal noise in his throat and holds on tighter to him. 

“Come on,” Jay says. “We can share.”

Finally, after a bit more encouragement, Jay gets Harvey out of bed and drags him into bathroom. Harvey’s moving like his feet are stuck in concrete, like it’s taking everything out of him just to put one foot in front of the other. When they get to the bathroom he slumps against the wall like he’s completely wrecked from walking fifteen feet. 

He doesn’t even start anything in the shower, just lets Jason soap him up, closes his eyes while Jay washes his hair and rinses it out for him. He leans against Jay as Jay washes himself and tries to help him wash his hair, but Jay ends up having to take over that too. When they get out Jay talks him into letting him help shave. 

Bruce walks in as Jay is standing between Harvey’s legs, a towel around his waist, sliding the razor carefully down Harvey’s jaw and neck. 

“He’s good at that, isn’t he?” Bruce smiles, leaning in the doorway. He’s already dressed for dinner, black slacks and a charcoal grey button up. Harvey just looks at him, his eyes still dark and heavy, almost hollow. “Jay -- may I?”

“Sure,” Jay says, setting the razor on the sink. “I need to get dressed anyway.”

He gives Bruce a kiss before he slips out of the room, leaving the two of them alone. 

Harvey doesn’t say anything as Bruce slides the razor over his face, just listens as Bruce talks to him about songs and music, about that one Christmas in Cabo, about all the food Jay and Alfred made, until finally he’s finished and he pats Harvey’s face dry, then takes it between his hands and presses their foreheads together. 

“I can’t do this,” Harvey whispers brokenly and Bruce just pulls Harvey against him and holds him. 

“Maybe not,” he says, pressing a kiss to the top of Harvey’s head. “But we can.”

 

: : : 

 

Christmas at Bruce and Jay’s is like if a Hallmark movie fell in love with a Ringwald film and had punk rock christmas special. There’s so many people Harvey doesn’t even know half of them and the other half seem a lot louder and more talkative than usual. Jay keeps getting pulled into hugs and tossed around from kid to kid, grinning from ear to ear like he’s eating it up, while Bruce watches Damian try to teach Lian how to hold a hockey stick. 

Harvey smiles when people try to talk to him or wish him Merry Christmas, sits there in the nice shirt Bruce picked out for him and tries not to throw the glass of cocoa Jay brought him at the wall. After the fourth or fifth person tries to come up and make small talk with him, Harvey makes up some excuse about needing to get something out of his car and slips out the back. 

It’s about seven degrees outside and he doesn’t have his coat, but there’s no way he’s going back in that house, so he shoves his hand in his pockets and heads for the garage. The bottle of scotch he saw a few months ago is still in there in one of the lower cabinets, so Harvey pulls it out and twists it open, takes it over and sits down in front of the drums. 

It burns when it goes down and Harvey closes his eyes and takes another pull. And another. He hasn’t had this in too long, Jay and Bruce watching him like a damn hawk, and right now he _needs_ it. Nothing else is going to quiet the bullshit in his brain. Not Bruce, Not Jay, not his stupid, useless pills. Just this, a bottle of alcohol and --

“Hi,” Harvey says to Damian over in the corner. “Didn’t see you.”

Damian narrows his eyes at him. “Why aren’t you in the house?”

Harvey takes another pull from the bottle. “Why aren’t you?”

Damian shrugs. “I don’t think you’re supposed to be drinking that. Doesn’t it mess with your medication?”

Harvey just laughs. That kind of laugh usually startles people, but not this kid. “Sure,” he says, raising the bottle up. “If I was actually taking them, yeah.”

Harvey waits for the guilt trip, for the lecture, at the very least a disapproving look or pitying frown, but all he gets from Damian is curiosity. 

“Why aren’t you taking them?”

Harvey shrugs and runs his fingers around the rim of the bottle. “Because I’m a shitty person who does shitty things? Who knows.”

Damian just stares at him for a few moments, then says, “You’re not.”

Harvey tears his stare away from the label on the bottle and says, “Huh? Oh no, I am. Trust me on this one, kid.”

“You’re sick,” Damian says. “There’s a difference between being sick and doing bad things and just being a bad person. Trust _me_ on this one.”

Harvey meets Damian’s eyes across the room and suddenly he gets it. He thinks he understands why this kid is hiding up here instead of being in the house with everyone else, that maybe he’s not the only one who hates this godawful holiday. 

“Hey,” he says, lifting the bottle up. “You want?”

Damian just snorts, but he pushes himself off the wall and stands up, then walks over and takes the bottle out of Harvey’s hand and puts it back in the cabinet. 

“Do you want to go back to the party?” He asks. “I don’t want to miss all the pie.”

Harvey _wants_ that bottle back in his hand. He wants to lock himself up here and drink till he sees the bottom and then find another.

“Yeah,” he says, pushing himself up off the stool. “Pie is important.”

 

: : :

 

“I’m just sayin’ is all,” Harley’s saying when Jason walks up to her and Harvey later after dinner. “If you ever just wanna grab a burger or something.”

Then she gives Jay a little wink and skips off and Jay slides into Harvey’s lap, looping his arm around his neck and kissing his cheek. 

“How you doing?”

“Okay,” Harvey says and it’s not too much of a lie this time. “Wondering what you got me from Christmas.”

“Well…” Jay says. “Bruce wants us to wait until Christmas morning to open them, but if you promise not to tell…”

“Cross my heart,” Harvey says, resting his head on Jason’s. “What is it?”

“It’s actually something I have to show you,” Jay says, then takes it hand. “Come with me.”

Harvey follows him upstairs to Bruce’s room, then watches as Jay starts to unbutton his shirt. 

“Uh,” Harvey says. “You’ve still got a boatload of people down there, you know?”

It’s not that he doesn’t want him, but -- jesus, he hates being like this. He does not want to have to explain to Jason that after being on his dick for three weeks straight he’s suddenly not in the fucking mood. 

“Shh,” Jay says. “Just come here so you can see better.”

Confused, Harvey steps forward, and Jay reaches for his hand, guiding Harvey’s fingers up over his heart, placing them right over the --

“Is that,” Harvey murmurs, brushing his fingers over the lyrics he wrote a few weeks after he moved in. 

“You’re so terrible,” Bruce says from the doorway, startling them. “I thought we were going to wait.”

Jay just grins and links his fingers with Harvey’s. “Bruce got them too.”

“Oh,” Harvey says softly. “Get over here, then.”

Bruce snorts, but he does what Harvey asks, unbuttons the top few buttons on his shirt so he can pull the material aside and give Harvey a peak of the words _nothing’s lonely now_.

“Jesus,” Harvey mutters. “Why.”

“Because we love you,” Bruce says matter-of-factly, taking Harvey’s other hand and sliding it in his shirt, over his heart. “Merry Christmas, Harvey.”

“Yeah,” Harvey says, overwhelmed with feelings. “I think it is.”


End file.
